Sunday, May 13, 2012

Mumbles and Jumbles

It’s official. Or so I think. Well, at least it’s true as far as I know : Men are more thick-skinned than women. Quite simple, isn’t it? Did I see you nodding your heads in agreement? Told you so.

And how did I come about this conclusion? How did I obtain this significant piece of information, this gold nugget, so to speak? Simple: Just by being alive, and watching. See simple experiment below:
  1. Take an equal measure of males and females, put them in an airconditioned room.
  2. The seating arrangements should be such that males and females are distributed equally throughout the room.
  3. Pick a day of moderate to hot weather (preferably between 28 and 35 degrees), and place the control  panel of the air conditioner easily accessible to all subjects.
  4. Observe the activity of the subjects in relation to the air conditioner, and note down the changes in temperature as time progresses.
  5. After nine hours you will find that the male subjects are partial to lower temperatures (below 24 degrees) while the female subjects are inclined towards temperatures that have crossed the 24 degree mark upwards.
I know what you are thinking. Men and women are different, they have different body temperatures and so on and so forth, but try spending nine hours everyday where the male population wants us to freeze until some brave female soul gets up and says “Enough is enough. There is so much subzero temperature a girl can bear” and changes the room temperature. Only to find it changed back by another male a few minutes later. It’s a happy merry go-round of temperatures, actually. See-sawing degrees. One goes up and the other goes down, which may or may not be the way to London town.

This is summertime, right? And it’s hot and sunny outside, right? And if we go out (by we I mean females) we carry umbrellas and scarves and hats, right? (I hear you girls!). But men still walk around without a drop of sunscreen on their bodies, no umbrellas (many would rather die) and not a cap or scarf or handkerchief on their heads. I salute you, possessors of the XY chromosome, on your toughness (What sun? You call this hot?), your absolute and uncontestable manliness and total disregard of trivial things like summer weather (Oh is it summer already? I thought we were in Alaska). I would give you all a five rating if you would not insist on freezing me to death everyday!

Oh, and that fellow who has stolen my doormat (again), please return it at its place. If you need a doormat so badly I will give you the money to buy a brand new one. Just knock on my door. Oh, and one more thing: just because I leave the doormat outside doesn’t mean I have donated it to the public. Not yet.

One should go crazy at least once every summer – Confucius.

4 comments:

  1. Haha vaiho mai mai i hlau ami? Off daih zel la.. :-P doormat chu dah tawhlo la ni mai lawm.. :-D

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  2. Hlauh lam a ni lo, there is such a thing as peaceful coexistence.

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  3. Hahaha I love the threat in the last paragraph :D You should maybe rig up your doormat with loose wires so your thief gets electric shocks :p And you're so right about men never carrying around umbrellas - even in the rainy season and then expecting us women to share ours, grrrr. Dumb males.

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  4. I had actually thought of that (rig up the doormat with some device that can injure). Maybe line the edges with shards of glass? Anyway I've decided I will put my oldest most worn-out doormat out there and whoever covets it so can steal it to their heart's content.

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